Actually I’ve already left.

Things have moved forward quickly since last we spoke :)I’m now at Lee Abbey filming various projects(including a promotional DVD) but the general upshot is that I’ve now left the olds house, feasibly not to return (to live at any rate). I’ve still no job nor place to live in Bristol yet but  Gods been very insistant on trying to get me to learn t live in trust and although itgoes against my usual way of doing things its refreshing … sometimes  (other times its just plain terrifying!)

At the moment its kind of organisational chaos as I try to gather all the ideas and footage needed for this  project . Should be fun

Yeah I know. Once again this blog gets sidelined as Real Life ™ takes over.

Things have been a bit manic over December. On top of working on a promo DVD for a local airsofting company I also prep’d for and attended another WWII airsoft event (which was sweet). Sadly it was so cold I got ill from it and from that moment on Christmas was doomed Well ok thats a lie I was ill then got better then got ill again just after Christmas and got better and now I think Ive got ill yet again. Woo

Christmas was nice. Saw both sisters, bro in law and nephews but it was all quite exhausting. Im now just about to disappear off to Lee Abbey again for meetings about several DVD projects, as well as visiting Emily in Bristol on the way down.

OH !! other news is that I have given myself/God a deadline. I feel I should aim to move out of the olds house by the end of Feb. Whether that means getting another job somewhere that will provide accomodation or something I dont know. I just know times up and I need to get out of here. I suppose thats both good and bad and I have no idea how this will happen but I’ll be looking towards Bristol (where I feel pulled towards) and see what turns up. It might also be sudden but maybe I need that to get my arse in gear.

I recieved my copy of UT3 yesterday (after about 3 months of pre-order) and played it a little yesterday. My first impressions are… its a little disappointing. Sure the nice new DX10 graphical effects look pretty and ooo nice new ragdoll physics.. but … I found myself feeling disappointed and wanting to go back to my old UT2004.

I guess its pretty hard to inject new life into a game format thats been going since 1999 and theres only so much you can do but there are various additions to this iteration that I simply find annoying. Top amongst this is the inbuilt online system tied to Gamespy. I find this ultimately frustrating as it reminds me of the terrible system that goes with Battlefield 2, whereby if you’re not connected 24/7 and play online all the time, you’re penalised for having the game! Ok its not that bad with UT3 but it irks me. The primary reason for this is my internet connection is fragmentary due to poor wireless signal in the house and crappy connection anyway due to living in the styx.

I guess I feel annoyed that Im being pushed into a way of playing a game that I dont particularly enjoy that much (certainly not so much with the twitchy shooters).

However I understand a patch is already in testing (quick considering it came out in Europe yesterday) so that will hopefully lighten my mood

Well it could be but thats a matter of opinion

Just a small update. Things have plodded along slowly since my last update. Financially things were very very tight and close to the mark. Thank God that Lee Abbey decided to make another order of Daves mime DVDs which has pulled me back from the brink. I also have another gig on with a local airsofting site at the beginning of Dec which will be fun.

I took at trip out to Budapest (Hungary) at the beginning of Nov to see some Lee Abbey friends for a few days. Had a cracking time and the city is really nice and friendly. Its one of the few cities I’ve been to that I’ve felt safe in.

In my limited spare time Im currently either playing Heroes of Might and Magic V (thanks to Emese’s brother from Hungary) or preparing for the Dec 16th WWII airsofting game at First & Only Woodland. Little things but they keep me amused

Went south to see my new nephew yesterday. Its the first time I’ve been back there since I was diagnosed with depression last year and things all went tits up. Getting there was ok but as soon as the train pulled into Watford I got a small twinge of stomach ache. This continued throughout the afternoon getting steadily worse. I wasn’t able to eat or drink which probably made it worse.

When we left it got acutely painful and I was having real trouble sitting in the back of my parents car. All the things that happened a year ago flashed through my mind, and then I recalled these scenes from Band of Brothers, where Private Blythe screams in absolute terror at the battle around him.:

Inside I felt the same, screaming out in total fear. It continued for about another hour until we were well up the motorway and then it subsided. Wierd psycho-sematic thing? yeah. It was hellish. It was so lovely to see my sister and her family but my subconsious reacted in a very violent way. I was thinking of the Band of Brothers episode. In the programme it follows on to this :

But for me there is no Captain Winters encouraging me on (or at least none that I can see) so I sit in my foxhole terrified to move…

Just a quick note to say my older sis had her 2nd child early this morning, a lil’ boy. Don’t know any other details but the birth was kinda tough so please pray for my sis.

As per usual this entry will begin with an appology for not posting more often yadda yadda yadda … etc

Many things have happened of late preventing me from even thinking of blogging (or doing that site overhaul I’ve been promising myself). Firstly I attended the Greenbelt festival in Cheltenham this year under the advisement of Pete Gunstone and Hannah Hart. It was primarily a business thing to try and see what contacts I could make and if I could spread news of the company. Sadly this was not to be the case as I found very little oppertunity other than giving out a few leaflets.

This was also soured somewhat by the extremely basic conditions. Now dont get me wrong. Im a seasoned camper having spent roughly 5 or 6 months in total in a tent in my adult life but I find a handful of leaking portaloos and water that is heavily chlorinated (and impossible to drink) AND that shuts off at the hottest part of the day a little much to bare. Plus the fact that although we had clubbed together to buy a program (essential for the festival but a shocking £8! on top of the entry fee) I rarely saw it meaning I spent most of my time wandering round not knowing what was going on.

The weekend was saved on the last day by a combination of things : Hanging out with Pete and Claire Newby (thanks guys), a suprise concert with Steve Lawson (of looping bass fame) and Lobelia (a new one on me but a delightful american vocalist and keyboard player) and possibly the best concert I’ve been to (ok theres not much competition…) The Duke Special Concert. (Now here is a band that understands stage presence! Pure Genius). So I left feeling I’d missed most of the festival and mixed feelings on whether I’d return. I’ve got another year

In other news work on Dave Hopwoods mime DVD has been completed and sent for duplication (sadly I cannot afford replication). I was hoping to have the results today but so far nothings turned up. Im off to Alex and Xintias wedding tomorrow (bristol) to film it for them (something I may move into as other groups charge £1200 for this service!).  I’ve also managed to get hold of Simeon Wood (who I found was in Oz which is probably why I was having a hard time getting hold of him). I had a very encouraging chat with him and we’re meeting up next week to chat about things and discuss some possible future colabortaion.

Other than business not much else to report. Lack of business is starting to take its toll on me giving depression swings. I did consider going back on anti-depressants but to be honest I didnt really notice the good effects last time only the sideeffects. I may try St Johns Wort to see if that helps. On top of everything else I kinda feel like Im in a wilderness. Gods around somewhere but I’ve no idea where or what hes saying. Financially things are very tight and Im living from a week to week basis. I keep telling myself its a test of faith but Im not sure how much I can take before I snap… could be fun .. but messy.

I’ve been using my Macbook Pro now for a month and Im quite happy with it. However there appears to be a great divide when it comes to Mac and PC users. Its kind of a love hate relationship. I wasn’t aware of it much until I started reading Mac magazines. These often have articles or printed letter praising the virtue of Macs and users who have “come from the dark side” (ie switched over).

I use both a Mac and a PC so I figured Im in a good position to feedback on a comparison of both.

Macs : Macs are purpose built hardware, made by Apple to run Apple software. This gives them a great advantage over PCs in that (in theory) software can be guaranteed to work on a machine and Apple will know exactly how it will run on any users machine. This is might sound ideal but has several disadvantages. Firstly there is a finite limit to how much you can upgrade your Mac after you’ve bought it. With a PC you can keep upgrading until you run out of money but there are only so many things you can replace with a Mac. Secondly on a hardware to hardware basis, Apple charges a lot more for components compared to a PC (assuming you buy branded items). Thirdly with the introduction of Apples use of Intel processors there has suddenly appeared a rift in the software compatibility area, namely software that is “Universal” and stuff that isn’t. In theory this shouldnt matter as Apples Rossetta software is supposed to translate anything not Universal, however the resources this takes up means that it can often be so slow its not worth it.

Mac processors seem to have been underpowered by raw comparison to PC chips, however this has not mattered as the operating system has been specifically designed to work with Apples chips. I feel this has fallen apart with the introduction of Intel chips. As an example video encoding on my 2ghz Dual Core Mac is rediculously long compared to my 2.2 GHz PC (single core) with less RAM! Another example was a copy of Ableton Lite 5 which came with my keyboard. The Mac version ground to a halt when I gotten it to play 4 software created notes at the same time. By comparison the same PC didnt even break into a sweat after 10 such notes. I find this very odd.

So you may ask what is the use of a Mac if its worse? Well the answer is that the Mac is a better machine should you want to just use it to do things (ie Arrange your life, Music, play DVDs, write the odd document, email etc). It starts up FAR faster than a PC but is almost twice the price. The interface is very pretty and all the nitty gritty tech stuff is hidden so that you dont even need to think about it. However this is also the problem. Should you want to (or are used to) tweak settings (for example, drop the anti-aliasing settings from the output of your graphics card) you would probably find it impossible as there is no way to control the hardware other than the Unix style terminal prompt. For power users (like me) its infintely frustrating. Once you get past this its fine but it seems like such a waste.

So Mac users thinking PCs interface looks crap? They’re right. PC users thinking Macs are toy like? They are right too. They are distinct enough to be different entities. I would however point out that the bitching and whining that goes on in Mac magazines (ie Nearly ALWAYS comparing Mac features to PC ones and pointing out how better they are) belittles them. Its extremely rare to see such things in PC mags so I wonder if its a feeling of slight insecurity. Just say they’re different and stick with that. If you love Macs - Good for you. If you love PCs - Good for you too. If you want the best of both worlds… buy both

Why is it that most cinemas now have a surcharge should you want to book in advance? Lets explore the logic of this. You are paying extra so they can have your money sooner. … That doesnt make much sense. Why should they charge you? They’re saving time of their staff meaning shorter queues (or even bypassing them entirely should the cinema have an auto ticket dispenser).

So why? Why the greed? It simply puts most people off booking. The only time it makes it worthwhile is when you’re taking a group of 5 or more. Grrrr

You may remember a while back I happend upon a filming location in a public park but had no idea what it was for (see here). Well I was in the cinema with some friends the other day watching the new Harry Potter film (and no it wasn’t Harry Potter Fills In A Tax Return ). The very last scene in the film is the students walking towards a train in a pinewood forest.

I suddenly recognised the location and the set. It was the very same set Id seen in Black Park back in October. It appears that W.B. was Warner Bros and that Red Lion Films must be a psudoname or some such for their projects. I am still suprised that they chose to build a train station rather than use the same one they did in the past (dispite the changes to Hogwarts itself that came with the new director in film 3). I wish I’d taken some pics now but I guess thats life. Still I feel slightly better than the use has now been found